What makes some people instantly likable? How can you make others want to be by your side, work with you, and follow you? Some people think that it’s all about charisma, an innate quality in some people, but the truth is that simple habits will make you instantly more likable.
The secret of this “magnetism” was highlighted by Emma Seppälä, lecturer at the Yale School of Management and author of the book Path of Happiness. In an article for Psychology Today, he cites research showing that “positive practices”—small gestures of gratitude and concern for others—can make you one of those magnetic people no one can resist.
“Showing genuine concern for others is a great example of positive practicewrites Emma Seppälä. This still applies, whether to cashiers, coworkers, roommates, or your family. It seems obvious (even boring), but often we get so caught up in worry and stress that we forget to pay attention to other people.»
Another positive practice is to remember, when someone seems insensitive or unfriendly, that they may have a past that explains their behavior, Fast Company details in an article. “By showing genuine curiosity, concern, and kindness in your interactions with others, you can brighten their day, strengthen your relationship, and both feel better after your interaction.», he added.
Emotions are contagious
Why can a small change like this make a big difference? Emotions are contagious, both positive and negative. So, if you are stressed or in a bad mood, you will encourage others to do the same – the opposite is also true.
“Positive emotions allow us to give the best of ourselves, wrote the specialist. They help us think more clearly, communicate better, and be more creative. When we feel emotionally safe, we are more open and engaged. Naturally, we connect more easily with other people. Our relationship improved.»
The author suggests some small changes in behavior to achieve this level of attractiveness, especially “small rituals of kindness“. “This could be sending a text to a friend every Monday to check in on them, writing a little thank you note, or ending the day with a few minutes of phone conversation with a loved one who lives alone.“, he explained.
Turning these small actions into habits, into something you do regularly without thinking about it and stick to your schedule, is a very effective way to cultivate a positive attitude. It can make you more likable, improve your relationships, and lift your spirits, all at the same time.
