We certainly don’t find that sex is a fundamental aspect in a couple’s life from the letter of the heart Daily Star. The suffering aunt of the British tabloids wanted to take as an example the story of a marriage in crisis precisely because of this age-old question. The reader has actually decided to address the topic of their intimacy, directly listing all the aspects that, in his opinion, should be improved: “During a conversation in bed, I criticized my man for reluctance to engage in oral sex and lack of imagination in sexual positions.” As if that were not enough, the woman raged: “I lack imagination even when I want to have sex in unusual places – like gardens and parks.” She recalled that in 2016, at the beginning of the relationship, she was “more adventurous”, also mentioning the elevator episode: “Your former boss caught us in the act and didn’t bat an eyelid. He just walked up to the tenth floor as if we weren’t there.”
Readers later said that she was associated with her husband “‘five out of ten’ for commitment and ‘three out of ten’ for imagination”. According to him, their sexual life”it needs a refreshHe admits that he rates himself a “two out of ten”, admitting that he often avoids intimacy by saying he is too tired. According to him, both of them will become “obedient” and tend to take things for granted. But now, his partner is annoyed, “sleeping with his back to me” and says little. The question posed to the column was whether it was permissible to express oneself sincerely on such an important topic.
Jane O’Gorman’s response highlights the importance of how you communicate. “Never underestimate the power of negative language. Bad words can hurt. How would you feel if he came at you talking like a Rottweiler?“. The expert clarified that good manners are very important in relationship matters and that there are more or less effective ways to deal with this problem. According to him, “I did not get the impression that your sincere confrontation was very kind or fair.” He also added that the man must have felt stressed when criticized for his technique, imagination and energy, and that his reaction did not surprise him. “Giving him a ten was cruel, you should apologize to him for doing it.”
O’Gorman suggests choosing the right moment to admit the mistake and start again with a more respectful form of communication: “Respect and courtesy should be the guideline.” Finally, he suggests having a romantic date and gradually rebuilding the relationship, asking his partner to understand that the intention stems from a desire for improvement: “You just want everything to be okay again.”
